Zero to Psycho

I just wasn't feeling dinner tonight.  I would have loved to have ordered out, but the 4 shoulder steaks sat staring at me.  Cook us, cook us, they cried.  I tried talking the husband into cooking, but ended up sending him out for dog food instead.  Not for us--the dogs!!!  I should have just gone ahead with what I knew...Swiss Steak....Mom's way, of course.  But there was a recipe on the meat package, so I thought, what the heck--Sweet and Spicy Steak with Onions.

It smelled great cooking, but somewhere in the back of my mind, something felt off.  I'm plating it up and discover that a few of the potatoes I had baked were not fully cooked.  But I went ahead and threw them out there along with the questionable steak dish.  I am not happy with this dish.  The love wasn't in it, and I knew it.

"Sit down to the table and have a look, the first complainer is the next meals cook."  That sign, passed on from my mother, hangs near our table, as it did at my childhood dining table.  And yes,  my children have had to cook the next meal, which is why they now never complain about the food put before them. 

Sitting at the table, passing food around, my oldest made the horrible mistake of telling me he needed money for his lunch account.   My family watched in horror as Mommy Dearest went from 0 to psycho in 2.5 seconds.  It was a frightening sight indeed, my hair standing on end, lightening bolts shooting from my eyes.  At one point I swear my daughter ducked under the table.

Then begins my tirade---"You want, want, want, but you never give, give, give."

Okay, now before put me up for Worst Mother of the Year, let me explain the background as to why asking for lunch money would turn me into the psycho princess.

--At the beginning of October, I sent in enough money to cover his lunch account for the entire month ($2/day).  He is out of money (and owes), yet there is still an entire week left in October.  Oh...he's been buying all the extras, ala carte, Gatorade. 

--Last week I spent $180 for yearbooks, half of which the boys promised to pay, but when the time came to pony up the dough, they had already spent their money on video games....as if they need more.

--Friday afternoon, my son reads me the list of supplies he needs for an upcoming event, to include cases of water and Gatorade, power bars, and 'healthy' snacks for the team, in addition to his own food,.  He also 'needs' $50 for spending money.   He want $10 for a hoodie. (he has 5 hoodies at home) .  He also 'needs' $35 for a monogrammed duffel bag he 'wants'.  My mother does that kind of thing, but no...that's not good enough.

But I want to be a good mom.  I tell my son, of course, we will get the necessary items, but that he's going to have to step up his game at home, do some extra chores if he wants all the extras. 

So...Sunday, I am working in the yard blowing and mowing leaves.  I spend 4 hours at this task.  (lots of leaves and lots of land)  Did my son offer to come help me?  Nope.  .

So, as you can see, I had been inundated with requests for money for days.  I was tired from working all day--alone, with no offer of help.  I didn't really want to cook dinner; which showed.  There was no love in that food.  I hate cooking a bad meal.  My mood was hanging in the balance.

Asking for lunch money tipped the scales.  Poor kid.